Updated: Apr 2, 2020
Hey girl, what's up? Oh boy, it's been a long time since I've composed a BLOG POST! But, did you know that blogging is how this whole MOMFIDENT AF thang started? Yup. If you've been around for a while, you might know that in 2015 I started a blog. It was the first "internet home" I had, despite starting 3 prior that I never told anyone about. Putting yourself, your thoughts, and your writing/opinions out there is SCARY! So I held back for AGES. It was just before I had my daughter in September 2015, and I decided to finally just go for it, regardless of what people "might think". (So glad I did!) The blog was called "Acorn & Coco" and this was before I even know who I was speaking to and what my content would be about. Primarily, it was to share details of late pregnancy, helpful product reviews, motherhood musings, and then milestones of my daughter as she grew each month. I come from the Fitness Industry so, as my blog grew, I started writing more about wellness. Health. Fitness. And then body image. And that's when things started to explode. People really wanted to hear more about body image, self-acceptance, self-love, "bigger" bodies, (I mean, I'm kind of a "mid-size" body; size 14-16 which is ACTUALLY average in North America, despite what marketing and advertising would have you think!) They wanted to hear more about accepting cellulite and belly pooches; how motherhood is tricky and hard (and magical, but also tricky and hard); how everybody struggles despite it feeling like you're the only one because of all the perfection and curated everything we see everywhere... so that's what I wrote about. I changed the name from "Acorn & Coco" to "Body Momfidence" in late 2017. Then I started "The Momfidence Podcast" in May 2018. Then I changed the brand to be the more bold and sassy "MOMFIDENT AF" you know today, and started opening up about more of my body issues and suggested strategies for acceptance. The Self-Love Journal was born in October 2018, and now I'm about to release my first full book, called (what else?) MOMFIDENT AS F*CK. Man, how things have changed! Speaking of which, that book is dropping TODAY (which is VALENTINE'S DAY, FEBRUARY 14th 2020, in case you needed a reminder!) And TODAY I also want to remind you - you don't need all kinds of flowers and chocolates and champagne and strawberries to remind you that you are worthy of love. I actually have never really "gotten" Valentine's Day, and am in the camp that it's kind of a "Hallmark Holiday" and an excuse for consumers to spend more money on things we don't need, but I suppose it's a nice gesture to have a day that's focused completely on *expressing* love. However, I feel that as a group, women spend a LOT of our precious time loving on everybody else, and forgetting about how to love OURSELVES. Would you agree? We generally put our kids, our partners, our family members... FIRST.
And for good reason... it's important to love those people too. But it's always going to be more difficult to expend your precious time and focus on others when you aren't giving YO'SELF the attention you deserve. And, like, that doesn't have to mean getting a manicure and a blowout or spending $1,982 at Sephora to "treat yourself" as an act of love. The lines are a bit blurry around what constitutes "self-love" and "self-care" and I think both of those concepts are getting a little out of control, too. They're glorified and commercialized. Everybody's hashtagging the 💩out of #selflove and #selfcare like it's going out of style.
It is, a bit. I think. Taking care of your self is definitely an act of self-love. Doing this on a regular basis is important. But sometimes it's just having alone time to re-charge without spending a dime. Sometimes it's digging into your latest read, uninterrupted, for 10 minutes. Sometimes it's enjoying a hot shower. Sometimes it's going for a walk with your kid to catch up on what they're going through right now. Sometimes it's taking your partner out for a nice dinner to connect and refresh. Sometimes it's having sex. Maybe even with yourself, by yourself. 🔥 Sometimes it's whatever the fuck you feel you need right this moment, without having to explain yoruself. Parenting is hard. Life is hard. Work can be hard. There's a lot of hard things in this life.
Loving your damn self should be EASY, but for many reasons, it isn't. It's hard. If you're struggling to find your way in a crowded "here's how you love yourself" space, I have something for you. My book MOMFIDENT AS F*CK - Embrace Your Mom-Bod, Love Your Self, and Carve A Path From "Meh" to "Momfident AF" launches TODAY, and I think it's the PERFECT way to gift yourself with some self-love this Valentine's Day! Snag your very own copy RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW, and treat the most important person in your life (....YOU!!!) to a raw, real, conversational read that is sure to help you understand how to embrace your self NOW, in a world that keeps telling you you aren't enough.
One love, mamas. XOX Courtney